


Were Before

by orphan_account



Category: Eleanor & Park - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: F/M, Gen, Higher Education, Post-Canon, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-09
Updated: 2013-11-09
Packaged: 2017-12-30 12:33:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1018668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Despite her best intentions, Eleanor doesn’t make contact with Park until the week before midterms, and it isn’t that as much as it is running straight into him while carrying a shit ton of books.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Were Before

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pie_is_good](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pie_is_good/gifts).



**1**

So she attends University of Nebraska, Omaha.

She attends after turning down two local universities and a full ride to some Pacific Northwest private liberal arts school she applied to on a whim, because everything here's still familiar and going anywhere else feels like running away.

Classes are difficult, but more rewarding than what high school presented itself as. It takes two weeks into the semester for Eleanor to realize that, but it’s not long before she grows accustomed to pulling all-nighters in the library and exchanging study notes with classmates.

Her roommate, Natalie, is nice, too. She’s a bit mousey, studying biochemistry - or something else equally intelligent - and it makes Eleanor’s plans to major in English literature _feel_ insignificent in a “sum of all humanity” type of way, but they eventually form a bond over mixtapes and pizza toppings, so she has to admit it’s pretty great.

 

**2**

Despite her best intentions, Eleanor doesn’t look up Park until the week before midterms, and it isn’t that as much as it is running straight into him while carrying a shit ton of books.

She’s silently muttering curses at herself when he speaks, “Eleanor?”

“Park.”

“Hey, how are you? I haven’t. Heard from you in awhile?”

“Well, I haven’t exactly been in hiding. Just been busy.” She’s shaking the leaves off _Macbeth_. 

“That’s not what I meant.”

“No?”

“No. Look - it’s only been five minutes and we’re already arguing.”

“Park.”

“ _Eleanor_.”

“It’s just - I haven’t seen you in so long, it’s weird.”

“I like weird, remember?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Well, do you wanna sit then? Catch up?”

“I have homework? But tomorrow. I’m free tomorrow.”

“Okay, same place? Let’s meet here without the bumping into each other part.”

“All right.”

“Hey.”

“Yeah?”

“I miss you.”

“I miss you, too.”

 

**3**

They start meeting for dinner at her dining hall every Thursday when he asks, “Why did you stop calling?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t act,” Park starts, then quickly switches to: “We started talking again. After your postcard, I mean,” he adds like Eleanor has forgotten. “Then after graduation, you just suddenly stopped. I was worried.”

“I know,” Eleanor says, and she - she looks down, twirling her ring around her finger. “I didn’t want you to wait for me. I knew if you knew I was coming back, you would wait.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I always thought, in the back of my mind, you would leave this town, so I didn’t want to be sure. I didn’t want to know, and I didn’t want you to stay for me.”

“That’s bullshit, Eleanor,” he replies.

 

**4**

“So - who’s the boy you’ve been seeing,” Natalie asks, running her fingers over the rim of her mug of tea.

Eleanor shrugs, “I’m not sure who you’re talking about.” She looks past Natalie, into the window where the wind is pushing more leaves off their branches.

“Come on, Elle” - a nickname, that’s new - “you’ve never played dumb before. The thin, hot Asian you’ve been eating dinner with. While you may think you can, but you can’t hide shit from your roommate.”

“Oh, _him_. That’s Park. He’s my ex, maybe?”

“Ex?”

“It’s a long story.”

“And it’s below freezing on a Wednesday night, we got time.”

“It’s a long _and_ depressing story. I don’t want to talk about it?”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I - you know I’m here for you, right,” she says, frowning. “I don’t have many friends here. Back home I did, but not here, and even if, I still _would_ consider you one of my closest, Elle. You're my bosom buddy.”

Eleanor laughs, then, “No one says that, and don’t call me ‘Elle,’” and throws a pillow towards her.

 

**5**

“My roommate asked about you two night ago.” They’re in the library this time, sitting side-by-side and glancing at each other’s notes (general education credits, nothing special) whenever they start feeling listless.

Park perks up once Eleanor continues, “I called you my ‘ex.’ I mean, that’s what we are - exes?”

“I don’t know,” he says, reaching for her hand, “I never considered us to be.”

“Oh.”

“You told me you didn’t want me to wait, but I don’t want that. I love you too much. I don’t think I could ever stop.”

“Well, I don’t know what I want,” she says, packing up her stuff.

 

**6**

Natalie’s leaving for her biology lecture when Eleanor storms in. “We got into a fight because of you,” she yells.

“Wait, what you mean.”

“I told Park about our conversation. Now he’s defining things again, and we went through this before - back in high school - and he, he doesn’t understand. Last time we tried this, it fell apart and I can’t do it again.”

“Elle - _Eleanor_ , look, I have to go, but did you - did you tell him this?”

“Yes.”

“As blunt as you’re being with me now.”

“Okay, no, but - ”

“But nothing, Eleanor. I don’t know much about your past, but talk to him. Look, I gotta go, but talk to him _please_. He’ll understand. From what I do know, he’ll understand. I gotta go.”

 

**7**

Eleanor finds Park outside her dormitory. “How long are we gonna do this?”

“Do what?”

“Fight in circles without acknowledging we’re fighting in circles.”

“Not for very long.”

“Oh.”

“Listen, Park. I’m sorry.”

“What do you have to be sorry for?”

“Everything. Nothing. I was expecting you to read my mind when I wasn’t willing to read yours.”

“No, Eleanor. I’m sorry, too.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

 

**8**

"You aren’t suppose to wait for me,” Eleanor tells him when they’re inside her room.

Park closes his eyes before breathing in deeply. ”That isn’t just your decision to make," he mutters. "I can't let you slip away." 'Again' is left unsaid.

Eleanor shrugs, “But that’s why I sent the postcard, that’s why I stopped calling originally.” She watches him pull a face, then: "To say goodbye."

"You couldn’t have possibly believed that would work." He sounds certain. Typical.

"Park."

"Eleanor."

“This conversation is still circular. You phoned every month up until this summer, Eleanor, but you - you came _back_. You are here with me again,” he says, pulling her in, and she smiles and replies, “Turns out I did missed you."

“Well," he pauses, running his fingers through her hair, “I missed you more."

**Author's Note:**

> I am so glad I was able to write this story. I hope you have a Merry Christmas and a happy new year!


End file.
